letter to my pre chronic illness self
I will start off by saying, i did not think this day would come. I did not dream of a day that i would have a "normal" job. Of course normal does not exist to me but you know what i mean! Living with a chronic illness, you can get caught up with the forever circling thoughts and only focus on your illness, you fight so hard for day to day things that you catch yourself not looking into the future, not dreaming of what could be. I got lost in the routine, i got comfortable with the "bubble" i was living in. Sadly, i had lots of disbelief in what i may/could accomplish, i was okay with just surviving. It took a lot of time, maybe too much time, to trust in myself and trust in my body. Time led to understanding my illness and adapting skills to listen to my body, "trust my gut", it took me years to be comfortable feeling unwell. Comfortable feeling unwell.. hard to believe that is what describes me today, but its true, i can go out in the world and i am not...